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2025
Speaking the truth near midnightTuesday, April 19, 2011
John 13:20-25 Leaning back against Jesus, John asked him, "Lord, who is it?" And Jesus answered.
Jesus asks more questions than he answers. But this time, he gave us a name. Judas Iscariot. He called him out, gave him bread and wine (just before he called it his body and his blood), looked straight into his eyes. Judas looked back and left the room. I don't want to be Judas. But I know I've betrayed Jesus. Many more times than once. And when he looks me in the eyes, which he does pretty often when I look in the mirror, I have to decide every time whether or not to leave the room. Stay with Jesus even after I know what I've done? I remember the cookie jar. How I closed my eyes when I took a cookie so Mommy wouldn't see me. But those were in the days before adulthood, and accountability, and becoming a man. Now ... I am done with childish things. Well, not so fast, davey-boy. Childish things remain. The sins seem bigger now. But I think they felt pretty big back then, too. Mom and I were together this weekend, celebrating a 70th anniversary reunion banquet with her at Lincoln Junior College (wow! she graduated in 1941 at age 18 and started teaching that fall, just before Pearl Harbor!). She still makes cookies occasionally. She still loves me a lot, and I still love her. She did indeed call me out sometimes for taking cookies, because it turns out that her eyes were open. If I can stay with Mom, surely I can stay with Jesus. His eyes are open. He knows my sin and stays with me still. He knows my Betrayal. And stays with me still. So I can be still myself, Lord, and be with you. When I feel alone, I can wait for you, knowing you will never leave me. I am waiting, really, for myself, for a rebirth of awareness and wonder and awe and joy ... that's what I love, that's what I think being loved means, and it soaks into everything else in my life. In our lives, everyone. |
How many questions did Jesus answer directly during his three years of ministry? According to John Dear in The Questions of Jesus, he answered ... three.