Christian Counseling Service -- Devotions

Thanks, Mom

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Matthew 20:20-21
Then the mother of Zebedee's sons came to Jesus with her sons and, kneeling down, asked a favor of him. "What is it you want?" he asked.

She said, "Grant that one of these two sons of mine may sit at your right and the other at your left in your kingdom."

There are some wonderful moments in my life when my mom really stood up for me. Especially when maybe it didn't make any sense.

I spent a week in Chicago during the Democratic National Convention of 1968. Although my friend Larry and I were there for a relatively tame conference on human relations at the Lutheran School of Theology, the conveners of the conference quickly adjourned the meeting and suggested we spend the week with the demonstrators downtown. We jumped at the chance.

When I came home to our farm I wrote a long column/letter to the editor for the Lincoln Daily Courier. A year earlier I'd spent the summer working full-time as a reporter, and the editor even mentioned that in the head of the column. I railed against American lethargy toward the Vietnamese War and exulted in the moment when a flag was burned in Grant Park.

That didn't go over too well.

I went back to Valparaiso University for my sophomore year, pretty clueless about the pot I was stirring. My mother, on the other hand, stayed in Lincoln and took the heat. She didn't really agree with me, but she defended me and shielded me from most of the nastiness. It took awhile, but I finally appreciated how strong she was, how bravely she stood in and stood up for me.

On a more regular basis my mom insisted that my hard-working German farmer father (who did have an accounting degree from the University of Illinois) give me educational opportunities and the time to realize them. They didn't come to blows (I don't think), but they had some pretty intense face-offs.

Dad needed me and wanted me to learn how to work, as he had learned. And I did help him milk the cows every night. But Mom taught me to read when I was four and wanted me to have time to learn about the world. One summer in grade school I decided to read all the World Book Encyclopedia articles about astronomy, the solar system and the universe. I got through a lot of them. Mom loved that.

As I read this Bible story I also think of Mom's blind love. Maybe not so blind ... I had been courting my wife Margaret for a couple of weeks, mostly to Margaret's dismay, and then I went away on a weekend Kogudus retreat to explore my relationship with God. Margaret went to my mom and told her she really didn't know what to do when I wrote in a note as I left, "We're so close, and we haven't even kissed!"

Mom knew about my dissolute past, my strange ideas about religion, my radical politics, my "issues" ... she knew what Margaret also knew - that I'd already been divorced twice and had yet to establish myself as a provider or stable husband.

But she looked Margaret right in the eye and said, "Isn't that sweet? Maybe you two are meant for each other."

I guess she probably thought I needed Margaret to hold me down to earth. I know she thought that. But I also really love the way she took my side and just let go of all the Stuff that could have turned her against me.

In our lives together something like that has happened more than once for every year of our lives. I sit here knowing I've written enough, but memories are popping in my head.

I'm 59, she's 86. And I love her more than ever. Thanks, Mom.

In you, O Lord, I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; deliver me in your righteousness. Turn your ear to me, come quickly to my rescue; be my rock of refuge, a strong fortress to save me.

Devotions Archive

Thanks, Mom

Wednesday, March 11, 2009